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Good to See the Boston Celtics Think Fab Melo’s Syracuse Education is a Joke

Globe Staff

It’s nice that a Syracuse education has become a complete punch line in the wake of Fab Melo. The 7-foot Brazilian bully got caught up in the courts at SU, was labeled one of the biggest busts in school history after his freshman year, was put on academic suspension in January, and then was deemed ineligible for the NCAA tourney.

So, of course when he was drafted by the Celtics a cynical Northeastern city expectedly threw some jabs. But did the front office really have to treat it like a rubber chicken dinner?

From an ESPNBoston.com piece (which was supposed to be complimentary toward the newest Celtic):

Now it seems he’ll be the target of jokes related to what some perceive to low intelligence and a less-than-stellar work ethic. 

When Danny Ainge jokingly quipped Monday about Melo’s business advisor, Rodrigo, also being his academic advisor, he joked publicly what many will likely say behind closed doors, or when Melo’s back is turned, at least throughout the opening stages of his NBA career. “

Specifically, when Melo introduced his business adviser Rodrigo, Celtics GM Ainge asked, “Is Rodrigo your academic advisor as well?”

That brought a hearty laugh from everyone and a punch to Ainge’s arm from Doc Rivers. But the head coach had to also get in a few zingers.

“Later, in an interview with Mike Lupica on ESPN New York Radio, Celtics coach Doc Rivers said he, too, joked with Melo about his academic struggles. 

‘We have no tests, I told him that yesterday. I jokingly told him, I said, ‘Listen we’re going to introduce you tomorrow and we’d going to do a Read to Achieve thing (with young students). Are you OK with that?’” 

Thank you, thank you! The Celtics organization will be here all offseason with plenty more yuks on Syracuse Community College. What is this a Comedy Central roast? Are Paul Pierce and Rajon Rondo texting “Fab thinks there’s screen doors on a battleship” jokes back and forth? Good lord, can you imagine what KG will say when Fab forgets what play he’s supposed to run?

Fab didn’t exactly sound like he was headed to the library.

“I did what I had to do on the basketball court, my responsibilities, stuff like that. I did. I struggled with the school. And I don’t have to go to class now, so that’s something coach or the coaching staff won’t have to worry about.” 

Egads, my Syracuse diploma is devaluing at 10% an hour with Fab and friends behind the mics. Let’s just hope Melo delivers for the C’s, because being dumb and proud of it is no way to go through life.

Posted: D.A.

The Fizz is owned, edited and operated by Damon Amendolara. D.A. is an ’01 Syracuse graduate from the Newhouse School with a degree in Broadcast Journalism.

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